Five Key Tips for Managing Overwhelming Emotions
Do you have a hard time regulating (or managing) your emotions? Do you wonder what's going on when your emotions feel dysregulated (or out of control)? The American Psychological Association (APA) defines dysregulation as “any excessive or otherwise poorly managed mechanism or response” (dictionary.apa.org). In the field of psychology, a commonly studied type of dysregulation is emotion dysregulation, which has been shown to negatively impact well-being.
Different emotions come and go throughout any given day. Experiencing emotions (even negative ones) is not a problem in and of itself. However, if emotions become overwhelming or out of control, they no longer help us and may then actively harm our well-being.
What is Emotion Dysregulation?
Emotional dysregulation is a complex collection of processes that are thought to include the following four main aspects (Gratz & Roemer, 2004):
1. A lack of awareness, understanding, and acceptance of emotions
2. A lack of adaptive strategies for modulating the intensity and/or duration of emotional responses
3. An unwillingness to experience emotional distress whilst pursuing desired goals
4. An inability to engage in goal-directed behaviors when experiencing distress
Given these four aspects of emotion dysregulation, D’Agostino and colleagues suggest all of the following are examples of emotion dysregulation: “avoidance, rumination, denial, emotion suppression, aggression, and venting” (2017). These are mental and behavioral strategies that ultimately make negative emotions worse.
Emotion Dysregulation Disorders
The extent to which individuals can regulate their emotions exists on a spectrum - no one’s emotions are always regulated or dysregulated. However, when one exhibits more extreme emotion dysregulation, they may be diagnosed with a mental health disorder. Here are some disorders that often involve emotion dysregulation: Depression, Anxiety disorders, Panic disorder, and Borderline Personality Disorder.
These disorders may involve poor mental emotion regulation strategies (e.g., rumination, avoidance, etc…), but they may also involve dysregulated behaviors (e.g., self-harm, substance abuse, binge eating, etc…). These behaviors are thought to be unhealthy strategies that are used to regulate emotions. So, they are often included in the definition of emotion dysregulation.
Tips for Healthier Emotion Regulation
Even if you don’t have an emotion dysregulation disorder, we can all benefit from learning healthy emotion regulation strategies. Here are a few:
● Exercise: Different forms of exercise, such as cycling and running, have been shown to help regulate emotion (Bernstein & McNally, 2018).
● Deep Breathing: When we are anxious, our breathing becomes quicker and shallower. Research has shown that deliberately deepening and slowing the breath can improve mood (Jerath et al., 2015).
● Mindfulness: Awareness of the sensed experience of the current moment.
● Acceptance: If you’re feeling sad, for example, it can be helpful to remember that sadness is a normal emotion that everyone has. This can help you judge yourself less for the emotions you have.
● Awareness: Cultivating awareness of your inner experience can help you recognize when and why you feel certain ways.
It’s normal for our emotions to fluctuate but if you find yourself struggling with frequent strong emotions that you can’t seem to manage, you might be experiencing emotional dysregulation. The good news is that there are effective ways to help regulate your emotions, including the tips discussed here.
If you want to go further, you may seek counseling with a professional in your state of residence.
If you are more interested in online options, you may like my signature program, “The Get on Top of Your Emotions System.”
It is a great package in which you have access to all of the modules and content as well as the right to attend the weekly Office Hours group meetings for life. That’s right! Once you have purchased it, you always are a part of the community that goes with it. There is also an optional private Facebook group where you relate with others going through the system just like you!
Go to the course page on this site to learn more!